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中国时间: 20:06 2016年12月09日星期五

礼节美语029:The Etiquette of Sympathy

  • 美国之音

陈豪在北京的ABC美国公司工作。他在走廊上远远地看到美国同事Amy,连忙赶了过去。

(Office ambience)

C:Amy, 我有点儿急事想请教你。

A:OK, What is it?

C:跟我一个办公室的Todd, 他妈妈在美国去世了。

A:I don't know Todd, but I am sorry to hear that.

C:他要回美国奔丧。我想为他做点儿什么,但又不知道怎样做才符合西方的礼节,所以今天早上我一直在躲着他。

A:That's a perfectly natural response. May I suggest a few things?

C:太好了,你快告诉我。

A:First of all, don't avoid him. Make a point of going to him immediately and offering your condolences.

C:什么是condolences?

A:Condolences就是表示同情、慰问。

C:我唯一能想到的就是 "I'm sorry to hear about your loss." 就这么一句好像不太够吧?

A:Sometimes that's all you can say. If you try to say more, it may be the wrong thing.

C:是呀,我也是怕说多了反而坏事。

A:If you can, follow your statement of condolence with an offer to help.

C:帮忙, 可我能帮什么忙呢?

A:Think of what he may need that you can do. You might offer to take him to the airport.

C:开车送他去机场确实是个好主意,可惜我没车。

A:What about work issues? Are there things you can help him with while he is away?

C:对呀,我们是一个组的,他请假,我可以承担一部分他的工作。我这就去跟他说。谢谢你,Amy.

******

MC:午饭时陈豪又看见了Amy.

A:Chen Hao, How did things go with Todd?

C:你说得没错。我说可以承担他的工作,Todd显得如释重负。另外,我还想到了其它可以出力的地方。

A:What was that?

C:Todd是我的邻居,他养了一只猫,叫Fluffy. 我告诉他说,他离开这段时间,我可以照顾Fluffy, 他听了以后特别高兴。

A:It is important to be specific at times like these. So often people simply say, "Let me know if there is anything I can do to help."

C:Amy, 你觉得我还需要送花和卡片吗?

A:You can, but that's not necessary since you are expressing your sympathy in a concrete way.

C:Todd还让我帮他取信。我有他公寓的钥匙。他回来之前,我还可以帮他买点儿新鲜蔬菜和水果。

A:You see how easy it is to think of acts of service for people who are grieving?

C:是啊,我们总是不好意思求别人办事,要是能主动提出来,那是再好不过的了。

A:That's right. Too often when people don't know what to do at a time of loss, they end up not doing anything.

C:幸亏有你,Amy.

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